Wednesday, November 14, 2012

The best and worst kind of day

Monday was such a dichotomy of days. A day off from work, gorgeous weather, and happy kids only served as a distraction from the heaviness that weighed upon me as I had to say goodbye to my sweet kitty. I am not ordinarily a very sentimental person when it comes to animals, but this was hard. I got Chachi at 3 weeks old, just a couple of weeks before my first teaching job. He lived with me in multiple houses and was around long before my husband. He was so like me in every way- loving when he wanted and stand-offish much of the time, more than content to be alone, and always around when you needed him. He gave of himself on his own terms. He was not the snuggly, in-your-face, lay-in-your-lap kind of cat I had always wanted, but he was so perfectly mine. When he fell sick a year ago I knew it was only a matter of time before things would progress. Lately he had simply been too weak and too sick to do anything. He was miserable. I know the decision we made was the right one and though we miss him I know that his quality of life was a punishment these last couple of weeks.

Situations like this are inevitable. I know that. Many will be the times that I will be faced with difficult decisions and the even more excruciating task of explaining such decisions to my kids. It's all a part of the deal. I can only hope that I will always be surrounded by the love of my family to ease the pain that I sometimes am not even aware exists just barely beneath the surface.

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