Tuesday, November 3, 2009

If I had only known

It's no wonder the baby business is always booming- they suck you in with how cute things are and then when you find out how absolutely useless they are you have to go spend even more money to buy something that actually suits your needs. Now, I am the first to admit that I do own some of these things and have actually used them, but if I had it to do over, I would make better choices. So here goes, my list of "just not worth it" baby items:


  • cute bibs. Let's remember here that the point of a bib is to get dirty. Filthy dirty. With foods that stain with absolutely no chance of ever coming out. One of the best gifts I received was a ten-pack of really ugly bibs with stupid sayings on them. 7 months ago I could have never dreamed of opening them. Now I use them every day. The 2 cute bibs that were handmade for me sit in the closet unused.

  • any blanket under 36 inches square. If it is smaller than that it is too hard to use for a swaddle and by the time they don't need/want to be swaddled, anything smaller is too small. (OK, you should have maybe 2-3 small blankets for use in the carseat or stroller, but you can't use them in the crib so many more and you'll be on blanket overload. Trust me on this one- I have 3 drawers of unused blankets.)

  • a cloth high chair cover. Remember my problem with cute bibs? You will use your high chair 3 times a day if not more. Unless you want to wash that cute cover twice daily, skip it. It really doesn't look that cute in your dining room when it is covered in peas and carrots.

  • pacifiers. The hospital will give you one and, if at all possible, you shouldn't even be using it. If your baby is a pacifier baby, chances are you will go through a few (or ten) different ones before finding "the right one".

  • sanitizers, sterilizers, bottle and wipe warmers. You can sanitize/sterilize in boiling water. Cold wipes never hurt anybody. (And they are really not that cold anyway.) You should get your baby used to taking a cold bottle from the get go. It just is not reasonable to be standing at the sink waiting for the water to get hot to then swirl the bottle for a few minutes while the baby is screaming. Do this when they are teeny tiny and then get them used to a tall cold one.

  • baby shoes. They can't walk. And their toes are the absolute cutest thing ever. Buy some Trumpette socks and some Robeez. They are cuter and much more practical.

  • swing. I actually did use my swing and I know many a baby that would probably never fall asleep but for their swing, but this is one of those "try it before you buy it" items. I swear everyone will tell you "you have to have a swing". The truth is many babies go absolutely ballistic in them. Borrow it from a friend before committing to the over $50 purchase.

  • any wipes other than Huggies. They are the best. Period.

  • bath toys that squirt water. They are like bacteria gardens.

  • bumbo seat. The bebe pod is better. Babies can escape out of the bumbo (and some little chubbers get stuck in it!) and the tray is a bit of a nightmare.

  • dreft laundry detergent. You can buy any brand of "free and clear" detergent. It is exactly the same and costs about $10 less per bottle.

  • expensive crib sheets. One explosion and you'll understand why.

  • attractive underwire nursing bras. You'll regret it. Promise. Just get the ugly non-underwire one. Are you really going to attempt to be sexy while nursing? Eww.

  • baby oil. I still haven't figured out what you would do with this.

  • thick cutesy burp cloths (the ones with the fabric down the middle). They are way too thick in the middle (they are meant to be diapers, after all). I can't really explain it, but they are just kind of awkward for mouth wiping. I have never been an over-the-shoulder burp cloth wearer, but I imagine they work well for that.

So I am sure that some, if not many of these items have been useful for some moms, but when it comes to stocking up, necessities they are not. Next up, my absolute favorite, why-would-you-even-consider-anything-else items.

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